Without a doubt, the wedding day of her little girl is also going to be one of your mother’s proudest. Your mother is probably going to be just about as giddy and excited as you would be – and she has every right to be! There is no denying that she only wants you to look your best, and the day to be perfect. But while you know that she only has good intentions here, there is no disagreeing with the fact that she can get a little too involved, too excited or might say things that can be embarrassing or upsetting in the midst of emotional exchange. Here are six such things that your mother should avoid saying.
1. “My daughter is getting married!”
What is wrong with that, you ask? Well, tell us how you are going to feel if your mother spilled the news of your wedding if you wanted to keep things under wraps? Yes, she may be super-duper excited, but unless you have asked her to or are okay with it, she should not go around telling everyone the good news.
2. “I am going to invite some people on my own.”
Your mother may have longtime friends and a long list of relatives that she may think should definitely be at your wedding. But, whether you have a budget for a limited number of guests or you just want to have a close, intimate ceremony and reception, you would not at all want to see guests at your wedding you did not invite.
3. “Let me handle everything.”
Your mother may give you her word to offer help when it comes to money, time, advice or anything else you could possibly need and that is a great thing. The problem comes if she misses the mark when delivering on those promises and leaves you freaking out about the things she said she would take care of in the days leading up to your big day. Make sure you talk to her first and ask her how much she can realistically help.
4. “It is not like that wedding.”
Nothing could be more annoying than if your mother started comparing your ceremony and reception to other weddings. You and your partner would certainly not appreciate hearing about how ‘your cousin Monica had a more lavish wedding and her wedding gown was undeniably more beautiful.’
5. “I am better than the groom’s mother.”
We know it is easy to get carried away, but you should let your mother know that your wedding is not a competition and she does not have to ‘out-do’ the mother of the groom. If your mother is shelling out for a more expensive dress or perhaps a bigger hat than your mother-in-law, it could really hold back the wedding planning process.
6. “It should not be like this.”
It would not hurt to hear your mother’s opinions about a few things, but you are not going to appreciate it if she becomes too pushy. There is a time and place for everything – she could help you choose between an elegant lace mermaid wedding dress and a stunning A-line wedding dress, but she must not have problems with things like your chosen décor, venue, floral arrangements, you get the idea. Even if they are your preference, your mother’s appalling opinions on them can be frustrating to get through.
The days leading up to your wedding can be very exciting (and stressful) for both you and your mother. And although we know that your mother only means well and is trying to lend a helping hand during the wedding planning process, just always remember that this is your big day and the thing that matters the most is what you and your significant other want. By all means, let her support and help you when she can, but remember to let her know when she crosses the lines with the things she says or does. After all, your wedding is the beginning of your new life, and you are going to want to start everything right.